At some point Tom Hanks came on, but I couldn't give him my full attention. He was wearing all black and I thought, that's pretty daring of Tom Hanks to wear all black, but I guess he's not seventeen, so he probably doesn't have/isn't worried about dandruff. And then I started wondering: Since when is dandruff such a huge problem? Since when is dandruff shampoo a hero? Since when is Jimmy Fallon's audience made up entirely of young men with low self-esteem, floppy hair, and loads of dandruff? What is causing all this dandruff? Then I wondered: Does Jimmy know about this advertising? Do The Roots know? Did they have similar dandruff problems when they were adolescents? Do they approve these ads? Does Jimmy know I never want to watch him at his regularly scheduled time again because I'm so grossed out by all the dandruffy boys and their dandruff-free fantasies in these commercials? What is happening? Gross. On so many levels GROSS!
Jimmy, if you are reading this, I still love you, but I don't love watching your show at night punctuated by dandruff shampoo commercials. In fact, I think the commercials gave me nightmares, and now instead of working on my book, I'm totally freaked out about what is causing this dandruff explosion and writing this blog post. For these reasons, I don't think I can watch your show at its regularly scheduled time ever again.